Humans Say the Funniest Things

Tweatsies? CweeCwee's always in line first. I let her go first 'cause she's got one vicious snarl on her! Woof-da!

My daddy says the funniest things sometimes. It was early this morning. Much too early to get up. But my dang humans were up and about, and so was I. Daddy says to me, “Go back to sleep, Delly, or you're gonna be tired and cranky later.”

I was like, “What the woof!?!”

Since when was a bichon cranky? We have the most sanguine tempers. Never a cloud in our furry skies.

Now my sister, CweeCwee the Doxiepoo, is another story. I can rely on her to rip the face off all my stuffed toys. Then the best part comes: pulling out the stuffing. Woof, woof, woof... You other bitchin' bichons know what I'm talkin' about. The fun of tugging on that fuzzy white stuff, trying to get it out the tiny hole that used to be your teddy bear's nose. The satisfaction when it goes "pop." The frantic licking when you can't get it off your tongue. The hacking when it tickles your throat. Mommy's fussing when it clogs up her vacuum for the umpteenth time. What an experience!

In five years, I can only remember being cranky once. I mean, it's not Cwee's food bowl. It's our food bowl. Her snarl was totally uncalled for. But I thought it over and decided to take the high road. I sat up very tall, put my mouth in her ear and said, "WOOF" at top of my lungs five times. Problem solved.

Hope you enjoyed my doodle. Writing by "paws and schnoz" is hard work so now, I think I'll take a little nap.

WOOF, y'all!

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