As a child, I felt loved for what I did but not for who I authentically was.
Because of this, parental correction and discipline was excruciatingly painful. It brought on full narcissistic collapse. This is the feeling that you’re less than nothing. Don’t deserve life. Are the lowest human on Earth. Are worth less than shit. Have no basis upon which to make eye contact with another human, let alone stand up to them. I spent many hours curled up in the fetal position, sobbing my eyes out.
Full Narcissistic Collapse.
Was I “defensive” as my parents called it? Absolutely! Fighting to be OK. I was fighting for my life.
Read Confessions of an Ex-Narcissist by clicking here!